Wow! What a woman!

Bloggers & Friends, 

I enjoy this font: 'Trebuchet'. It's quaint isn't it? The post previous to this one on trust...I used a lot of old fashioned words no one really uses anymore; however, I am a creative writer and have always enjoyed writing since I was little. I suggest you look up the words if you don't know what they mean. 

Anyway, as I have previously explained on this blog, I don't particularly enjoy picking out titles for things because it's an awkward stance...therefore, what you see is what you get; however, today the title means something. To me "what a woman!" is someone that holds themselves high. Not a snobby or materialistic person; not a woman that gives out more than she receives. A woman that holds herself pure at all measures. A woman that respects boundaries & doesn't flaunt herself innapropriately for the world to see. A woman that ordains and respects marriage and family. In my very own opinion, there are too many women or "girls" I like to call them because that's what they are that don't respect what has been ordained by God. Now people argue that there is no God; no higher power; so, with that being said, shouldn't character have something to do with it? Each of us should have common sense. We are born with it no matter how absent minded our parents were. Anyway, some of you may disagree; but, there are women out there that tempt men to look at them, flirt with them, accept them. There are women out there that defile the wife by tossing themselves at married men. It's crazy. What happened to single people dating single people? Wives shouldn't have to feel like they are competing for the attention of their husband. Single women should leave married men alone. PERIOD. Wouldn't these women EXPECT other women to do the same thing once they get married? Anyway, that's my rant of the day. 

Moving on, I have recently started thinking about picking up photography. Maybe I have mentioned it to you before; but, I have been taking lots of photos lately; especially in the past few months. I love it!! I feel like photographers are a dime a dozen & I have friends that are photographers...however, I love photography! I am not a professional; so, those photographers that are friends definitely have that going on! I want to learn so much about it. I actually have my first gig coming up maybe in a few months; a new good friend of mine personally asked me today. I was thrilled!! ~ Maybe by then, I will have a better improved camera? I documented my cousin's wedding for example this Summer & the pictures with my camera actually turned out marvelous! :) So...maybe I will have another blog up soon that specifically has my photography written all over it? I will definitely post the website...I mean, I have to get my name out there somehow; and how did other photographers start out if they didn't experiment? ~It should be fun!~
Today, I spent the whole day with my good friend Susan at a private business owner sale day! The weather was fabulous & we sold an okay amount of stuff. I am going to do my best to help promote her business! WHY? It's not because we are friends; it's because she has a GOD GIVEN GIFT to create. I mean check it out for yourself! She makes everything by hand & so does her mom. They both do custom orders and can make anything for any occasion, time of year, any age. You name it; they can do it. <3
Their business is called BLOSSOMISTIC! Here's one webpage you can go to:  http://www.facebook.com/pages/Blossommistic/184011034960717

I love their stuff! :) Give it a looksie. :) She has her business information on there if you see something you like. :) 

What else is new? We are....not pregnant! I have had some people ask me that lately; and, I just want to make it clear that we aren't trying at the moment. It will be awhile till we do; however, once it happens we will DEFINITELY  let everyone know! So, if you see a bump...well, that's my lack of a six pack and it's hurtful when someone makes a pregnancy comment...so unless you are for sure; don't ask. Think: Would I want someone doing that to me? In public? Patting my stomach? Cooing over me? I bet...not. 

So. I have learned so much important aspects about my life. ~ I need to make a lot of changes to make a positive difference. ~ Last night, I had so many awakenings shed forth that really brought me down to tears for half the night till I grew so tired I fell asleep. Most of all, I haven't been the daughter of God that I know I can be. I haven't been the wife I know I can be. I haven't been the daughter I know I can be. I haven't been the friend I know I can be. I haven't been the example I know I can be. I haven't been the teacher I know I can be. ~ I took my problems and wrapped it in bitterness, depression, and anger for so long that I secretly became that person. I became what I didn't want to become. I gave up. Simple as that. I gave up the woman that I know I am destined to be. I didn't trust anyone; I refused to trust Andrew. I refused to trust period. I always questioned everything around me and everyone. I live my life in total and complete fear constantly. ~ I have recently learned so much about myself as to why I became like this and the source of my problems was unexpected; however, it makes complete sense. I have had to cut some people out of my life and I am hoping it's temporary. I hope things can be mended & sorted out according to how Heavenly Father would want it. I didn't want to do that; but, I am trying to change my life. Mold it and part of it was over pure anger and disgust. Though some of the people won't admit that they have wronged me; I must learn to forgive. I must learn to let go of that bitterness and part that makes me so cold. ~ I must accept that people are the makers of their own destiny. They are the guide of their souls. I must no longer worry about their judgment day; but, mine alone. I must consider my fate over theirs. Though I have been blindly robbed of several important aspects in my life; I must remember most importantly that I strongly desire not to rob my future children of the same aspects. ~ I must bring together the family I have now; I must become the daughter of God that Heavenly Father has prepared me to become. 

In my home, a dear friend gave Andrew and I this picture frame encased is a set of "Home Rules" 

1. Always be honest (Proverbs 12:22)
2. Count your blessings (Psalms 34: 1-3)
3. Bear each others burdens (Galatians 6:2)
4. Forgive and forget (Micah 7:18)
5. Be kind and tender hearted (Ephesians 4:32)
6. Comfort one another (1 Thessalonians 4:18)
7. Keep your promises (Romans 4:21)
8. Be supportive of one another (Acts 20:35)
9. Be true to each other (Revelations 15:3)
10. Look after each other (Deuteronomy 15:11)
11. Treat each other like you treat your friends (Matthew 7:12)
      ~but most importantly~
12. Love One Another deeply from the heart (1 Peter 1:22)

These home rules have been sitting on our wall in our bedroom for 22 months. I haven't looked at them at all; really looked at them until now. Last night I had the thought that I needed to get out of bed and look at these rules. I did. My heart caved. I hadn't been faithful to these rules. I felt ashamed of myself! I begged for forgiveness. 
*How do I feel now? Today? This beautiful Sunday morning? I feel nervous for what's to come. Of course for someone that has lived in fear, that's expected to not change over night. I feel like I need to absolutely do this! I need to apply all of these rules daily. I need to give Andrew the support that he has been lacking from my part so severely. I need to remind myself that I can trust Andrew he is faithful, he is honest, he is faithful to His Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, he is faithful to me. I need to remind myself of that every time I have those cringing thoughts and sequences play in my mind. Satan knows my weaknesses. He knows my intense struggles. I need to be the wife that Andrew deserves. I need to be the wife that Andrew worked so hard for to obtain in his life. I need to be the woman that he has chosen. I need to be the wife that Heavenly Father has intended for me to be. I know He so strongly desires me to be the woman, wife, mother that He has sent me here to be. 

~I have faith that everything else that's shattered from people's choices will be mended over time. I can't beat myself up for the choices of people I trusted. I can only fix myself and that saying is true in so many many ways. 

Ladies and gents, It's time I light my torch and march forward into the abyss of what life brings sometimes. It's time I hold tightly to the iron rod and this time never ever let go. 
I am doing this for myself, my relationship with Heavenly Father (God), my marriage with my sweetheart Andrew, my future children who are currently counting on me as they see me make my life choices, my friends who love me dearly, and all future people I am meant to meet and help. ~Change isn't going to be easy; there are going to be times when I have my short comings; however, I must press on. I must build my trust in the people that matter most to me. I must have faith. 
I must continue to be encouraged. 

Well, it's Sunday. I should get ready for church now. Thank you for reading. <3

It will always be, 

A&G :)